Monthly Archives: October 2017

Big Zee! Elvis wrote ya a letter

maxresdefault.jpgDo you know who I am
Have you have any idea who I am
Yes it’s been quite a while
And it’s so good to see you again

Man, I’ve  just had to break my silence on this one. Geez, guys and dolls, when are you going to wake up? If even I start feeling the pressure to speak up, you folks should have done so long ago.

Now, y’all know I can’t really come back like this. I sang about it a long time ago, too!

Not a shirt on my back, not a penny to my name
Lord I can’t get back home this ole way

But, despite being the richest guy with nothin’ to my name, I’m sure y’all will maybe pay a bit of attention to what I have to say (or sing). People called me many things back then, some of them good but most of them not so nice. I don’t care. Like most prophets, I was scorned in my day. Who remembers the song I wrote ‘specially for South Africa?

Big boss man, why can’t you hear me when I call? All right
You know you ain’t so big, I said you’re just tall that’s all, All right
I’m gonna get me a boss man
One who’s gonna treat me right
I work hard in the day time
Rest easy at night…

But you didn’t listen back then. You’re not listening now. Mac Davis and Billy Strange wrote a song I used to sing. Man, I loved that song! I wanna give it to you folks now, so maybe you’ll take it to heart:

Clean up your own backyard
Oh don’t you hand me none of your lines
Clean up your own backyard
You tend to your business, I’ll tend to mine

But no! Even from where I sit, I can see you following the big Zee into Cotton Candy Land. That ol’ man running y’all into the ground jus’ keeps on laughing all the way through your bank accounts.

Sandman’s comin’, yes he’s comin’
Take his magic hand
Now goodnight…now sleep tight
In cotton candy land

Whatever you thought about me or my music, I paid the price for fame and fortune; I surely did, yes sir. I got fat and eventually my heart jus’ had to give in, man. One moment tick-tock, the next … nothing. So you see; I can talk because I lived through that experience. To ride that wave so high and then come crashin’ down, is the worst trip you’ll ever been on. Even the Bachelor Boys sang that one very sweetly.


Well, I found a new place to dwell
Well, it’s down at the end of Lonely Street
The Other Side Hotel
Where I’ll be–where I get so lonely, baby
Well, I’m so lonely
I got so lonely, I simply died.

Now, you folks down there in the South of Africa, it’s time y’all paid me some attention, understand? I’ve got nuthin’ to lose, but you? Oh my, you’re about to lose your country! Here’s how I feel ‘bout it:

I’ll never forget the night you told me
That you could live without my songs somehow
That’s all in the past, I knew it wouldn’t last
But I won’t care a hundred years from now

An’ that’s no lie. I shouldn’t care, but I do. That’s why I have this message for you and if you listen carefully, you’ll hear the Big Zee singing along wit’ me:

I washed my hands in muddy water
Washed my hands, but they didn’t come clean

So, here’s a song for y’all:

Well, here’s my real message for your Big Zee. He might strut aroun’ and think he’s fooled everybody – including you – but boy! I have some news for that gentleman. He aint nuthin’ but a houn’ dog, you know?

Well they said you was high-classed
Well, that was just a lie
Yeah they said you was high-classed
Well, that was just a lie
Well, you ain’t never been honest
And you ain’t no friend of mine

The bottom line? Well, you know how it is. Someday you will all join me on the other side. No money, no fame, no nothing of your’s will work over here. The only thing you bring along, is your history. What you did and how you lived – that counts a hell of a lot over here (if you’ll excuse the pun)

Big Zee? You listenin’?

Be afraid.

Be very, very afraid…